How-To Write an Interesting Title, Oh, I Mean How-To Reflect On a How-To Paper

When I first got the assignment I thought of the ever-elusive How To Make A Peanut Butter Sandwich assingment that no one could do competently in fourth grade.  After we read the examples I felt much better and decided that although I am not really a humourous person originally I would try to write a humerous paper.   My partner and I were going over possible topics and she came up with "How To Stay Dry When it is Raining" and it was the suggestion that seemed like we could write it best, compared to the others.
Writing the paper was easy. My partner, Cassie, helped me come up with the original points and I took it from there.  The writing just seemed to roll off of the keyboard onto the screen.  The only obsitcal that I experienced came from a lack of a partner to bounce ideas off of and to proof read what I wrote but I am usually a solo writer so having no partner was only a minor annoyance.
If I was to revise it now I would reword to introduction to include how to stay dryer than you would without an umbrella because that is what some of the points are about not just "how to stay dry when traveling in less than ideal weather".  I would also include in the "Wait untill it stops raining" suggestion that the person wait by a window so as to keep an eye on the weather.  Some sentences need to be reworded because they are a little awkward. Like "This works best if you already have a friend with an umbrella nearby.  If not this method could keep you dry."   I think I should combine it into one sentence.  Those are the only things that I would change.
I would also like to say that upon reading it after leaving it alone for so long I am happy to see that I actually wrote a funny paper. Like "Warning: depending on what you choose to use (as an improvised umbrella), this method may result in looking stupid." I am usually a very serious person.

How to stay dry when it is raining outside

It happens to many people all around the world, you walk out the door and into a downpour.  No one likes to be wet (which usually leads to cold) and some more sensitive materials that you may be carrying (ipod, computer, papers, books, etc.) can be damaged by the water in the deluge.  So if you lack an umbrella or raincoat how do you stay dry when traveling in less than ideal weather?

*1. Steal someone’s umbrella

This works best when the person is not paying attention. Choose someone who looks less physically fit as you, so you can out run them.   Nab their umbrella; open it while running, then run like hell.  They probably won’t chase you because they don’t want to get wet.

2.   Run from building to building/take shelter on the go

Usually there will be structures under which you can take cover and stay dryer.  Run from structure to structure. Especially look for overhangs of buildings because they work best. Avoid trees because they drip and that is counterproductive to the goal of staying dry.

3.   Buy a raincoat

There are many places (especially in urban settings or around attractions) where there are venders of souvenir raincoats or umbrella.  They are usually overpriced but often it is worth the price to stay dry.

4.   Make a raincoat or an umbrella out of the materials that are available

People in today’s world rarely walk around carrying nothing at all.  Items such as purses, backpacks, binders, and even pizza boxes can be held above your head to block as much of the rain as possible. (Note: do not use anything that you would not want to get wet.)  You can also buy something from a nearby vendor that you could use as an improvised umbrella. Warning: depending on what you choose to use, this method may result in looking stupid.

*5. Make friends with someone with an umbrella

This works best if you already have a friend with an umbrella nearby.  If not this method could keep you dry.  Choose a person that looks like they would help you and preferably of the opposing sex.  Approach the person and try to appear meek.  Tell them a story that is believable, true of not, so as to supply and explanation as to your lack of weather gear and why you would like to share their umbrella.  If the person does not appear receptive, back away and choose a different method or revert to method 1.

6. Avoid puddles

When you are young puddles are delightful opportunities for fun however with the goal of staying dry in mind they become pit traps of danger.  Even with an umbrella or raincoat these little pools of water can be dangerous.  Depending on the depth of the puddle one misstep could lead to total failure to remain dry.  So, examine the ground before you at all times.  Look for the reflection of light off the surface of water on the ground to judge whether you can step there in reasonable safety.  Attempt to walk on high ground and paved roads because puddles can hide under grass or leaves undetectable. Most importantly, if you see a puddle, go around.

7. Get a car

One of the many advantages of cars built after 1891 is that they have roofs and windshields that can protect you from the natural elements of wetness.  The key is to always park as close to the building you are going to enter as possible.  That way you have the shortest distance to walk and when it rains the least amount of wetness.  After entering the car you will be able to travel in comfort and be very happy watching all the poor saps that don’t have cars getting wet.

8. Walk don’t run

Worse case scenario, no raincoat, no umbrella, and no other option, you must walk through the rain to get to your destination.  In this absolutely horrible case it is better (believe it or not) to walk through the rain and not run.  When you run you take up more raindrops because you are moving into them as you move.  It is scientifically proven that it is better to walk calmly through the rain then to run.

9. Wait till it stops raining

It never rains forever (at least not yet it hasn’t) so just head back inside, find something to preoccupy yourself and wait.  Usually the average storm is over in about two hours so pending it started while you were still inside it will usually be less than two hours till it stops.  Then you can head on your way safe and dry, although we suggest you refer to 6 as there will still be puddles on the ground.

10. Don’t walk close to roads

When cars drive through puddles on the road it often sends up a huge wave, usually right onto the sidewalk.  In order to minimize wetness walk on the far side of the side walk in order to avoid this unpleasant hazard.

11. Stop caring, its only rain

I mean, come on, its only water.  If you have something that needs protecting, protect it with your body by hunching over it or by placing it under your shirt or jacket.  A little water never hurt anyone, you are only getting wet.  If you get soaked it could be unpleasant but really life is about more.  Most of the time you are just heading home where you can change your clothes and curl up in a blanket on the couch.  We suggest that you go out and dance in the rain at least once in your life because it is good for you (do it when it is not thundering, and preferably warm outside)

*This publication is not responsible for any arrests or convictions that may result from the use of the methods suggested