The One, The Only, Original Food Paper

This paper was a descriptive-expository-compare and contrast paper and thus we had to learn how to write these various sub-modes of writing.  The thing I found the hardest about this paper was to sound interested in something I was not because if you are bored with your topic then the reader will be bored.  The thing that I found most interesting in my research was the story of how the potato chip was made, so I decided to start with that.  Right before we started writing Mrs. Basko said it would be okay to do a two paragraph introduction so that is what I wrote.  In a strike of inspiration I started writing the rather modern tale of the creation of the potato chip in a storyteller tone and that got me pumped enough the rest of the paper just fell in line.  Looking at the prompt for the essay I figured that the easiest thing to overlook would be the compare part of the essay so I really tried to keep that in mind and write an essay that was in subject-by-subject format and compares the same points.  To get the points I went to my own personal definition of a potato chip (That was my definition part of the essay).  I also tried to use the descriptive flowery language that makes reading essays interesting to the readers.  This paper was a cumulative paper that mixed several modes of writing but then again most essays are.
I think that this paper may be one of the best drafts I have ever written.  I believe that is due to the teaching in class that we had just before writing the essay. When I reread it I thought that it was very well developed essay that was interesting to read.  I have a horrible tendency to write papers that are too long but this time I think I may have gotten it to the right length.  There really isn't anything that I could cut out without losing meaning to the essay.  However it wasn't perfect, the thing that is most apparent to me as I reread it for the first time is that I should reread my paper before I submit them.  There are misspelled words that were not caught in spell check and some sentences that didn't make sense.
My partner did not give much feedback which indicates that either my paper is pretty good or that I have a  partner that is not naturally critical. She liked my title the way it was but if I was going to change it then she thought "It's Crunch Time; Who Will Emerge Victorious" was the second best title.  She said my my introduction was attention getting, told what the reader was going to read next, and liked my opening sentence.  She did notice the occasional sentence that didn't make sense and a few misspelled words.  She also suggested even more flowery descriptive words to spice up the essay.  She also believed that it was the right length long.
I really believe that in revision I am not going to change much.  Normally almost my entire essay gets scraped in revision in favor of another rough draft but this time I think I got it right.  I am going to go through each sentence one by one and look at each, probably rephrase some of them, and fix words that are misspelled.  Overall, reading my essay after revision there won't be an overall change in the feeling it gives or the points it makes.

The Lays Potato Chip Kingdom According to Sam

Once upon a time (1853) in a kingdom far far away (Saratoga)… there was a picky customer that entered a restaurant and ordered.  Unknowing that he was walking into a trap the brave Sir George Crum served an average meal.  Once the picky customer got the meal he pitched a fit and demanded better French fries, ones that were crunchier and thinner.  Taken aback by the customers vehement complaints the cunning George Crum took potatoes and cut them as thin as he could and broiled them in oil then added a dash of salt.  He had created a creation so thin and crunchy that the picky customer could not complain and would be forced to quite the contest of server and satisfaction.  When the customer got the thinly-cut-potato-fries he jumped up and proclaimed them as the best ever.  Word spread far and wide about the legendary thinly-cut-potato-fries and soon everyone wanted some.  And thus the potato chip was created, the end.

            That could be called the end of the story but really the story goes on.  It goes on to 1921 when potato chips were mass produced and sent overseas to Britain where they were called potato crisps because potato chips were French fries in Britain.  The story could go on to 1932 when Lays potato chips were started, or it could go on to 2010 when seven strong individuals in Mrs. Basko’s ninth period class endeavored to determine which type of Lays potatoes chip was the best.  Who would win the contest? Would it be the Lays Light Potato Chips, the Lays Baked Potato Crisps, the Lays Natural Potato chips, or the classic Lays Classic Potato Chips?  Well, I’ll tell you. 

            Going into this contest my personal definition of a potato chip is as follows: a thinly sliced, crispy, golden yellow, potato slice that was boiled in oil with generous amounts of salt on it.  A potato chip must give a delectable mouthwatering crunch when bitten and leave a slight residue of salt and oil on your fingers. 

With that in mind the Lays Baked were out almost immediately.  Not only were they to brittle to give any crunch at all but the also had little to no salt, were more oily, and, as my fellow taster stated so delicately, tasted like cardboard.  They did advertise that they had 80% less fat than normal potato chips but that really doesn’t make up for all its flaws.

The potato chip that I gave 3^rd was Lays Light.  The bag is a cheerful blue with a person jumping for the “i” in light and clearly stated that it had “All the taste with half the calories!” and was “Fat Free”, also it had “Made with olestra” in very small print at the bottom.  When tasted that might be true, it tasted saltier than the others and was definitely thinner sliced potato chips and a bit less greasy.  Given just that I would have awarded it 2^nd, but then I went online I found out about olestra. Olestra was defined online as “a fat substitute that adds no fat, calories, or cholesterol, usually added to high-fat foods like potato chips, has unpleasant side effects.”  That was all the first site gave me so I looked for more, what unpleasant side effects were they referring to? Turns out that olestra causes abdominal cramping and loose stools and causes steatorrhea (anal leakage) and prevents the absorption of some vitamins and nutrients.  It was FDA approved in 1996 but they required that they add a warning label on any product that contained it.  After much pushing they took away the warning label requirement in 2003.  Olestra is so bad that it is banned in some countries including the United Kingdom and Canada.  Lays Company used this dangerous product just so that they could proclaim “Fat Free.”  I am outraged and offended that they would endanger the welfare of the nation by using olestra, which placed this type of Lays in 3^rd.

The Lays Classic comes in 2^nd and the Natural in 1^st.  I would freely admit that before my tasting tests the only potato chips I had tried was original lays so my definition of potato chips was based on them and I was bias towards them.  They are exactly my definition of really good potato chips, a thinly sliced, crispy, golden yellow, potato slice that was boiled in oil with generous amounts of salt on it.  They were good.

            However Lays Natural was great.  You could tell the difference as soon as you bit into it.  It was thicker which supplied a much more enjoyable texture.  They also had a different salt smell (they claimed to be made with sea salt which probably supplied the difference).  But they still emulated the original taste.  The difference between them was big but the best of the original (the taste) was included so they clearly came in first.

            That is my ranking of chips however, if the question was whether I would buy the natural falls into 3^rd while the Light and Original Lays move up because although the Natural Lays are better they cost much more, almost double.  I have always economical in my spending and the difference that the Naturals have is not enough to warrant spending extra cash.  I still would never buy Baked because I think they taste awful.

Resources:

http://en.Wikipedia.org/wiki/olestra#Side_Effects

Http://www.fritolay.com/lays/3simple_ingredients.html

http://dictionary.com

http://www.ideafinder.com/history/inventions/potatochips.htm